Nvm- finally found it by rooting around in the Device Manager.

The wake on LAN setting did the trick, but now it just exposed another problem. :( Now when I purposely awake my computer, it no longer "awakens" my router. That is, the network light stays dead, whereas in the past, it would light up when I woke up my computer. It's pretty important that this happens, because if it doesn't, there is no LAN and there is no internet connectivity until I reboot the router (or find some other computer to ding the router "on").

Anybody ever have to wrestle through this? Is it so hard to have it both ways with this thing? Why does the wireless seem to end up hitting all the bases more reliably (other than bandwidth, of course)?

I'm having some success by setting the following in the Device Manager for the Network Adapter:

enable- allow computer to turn off this device to save power
enable- allow this device to wake the computer
enable- only allow management stations to wake this computer

The key that made the difference is in the next setting in the Advanced tab:
Shutdown Wake-On-Lan- enabled

I don't know what it does or why it makes a difference or what it even means.